Difference between revisions of "User:Ghost orm"
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Revision as of 09:37, 6 October 2013
Ghost Orm is an active serving member of EVE University and it's Personnel Department, working as a Senior Personnel Officer]
About Ghost
Ghost Orm knew just about nothing about EVE when he joined E-Uni. Some say that statement is still true to this day! Somehow he managed to blag his way into the E-Uni Personnel Department and give people the wrong impression that he knows what he is doing and is reasonably (in)competant.
Time will tell before he is found out.
He was drawn to E-Uni by the abundance of attractive female staff profile portraits seen there. Imagine his horror when he heard them on voice comms and realised that 99% of them were actually guys. He consequently felt cheap, used and violated. An accurate epitaph if ever there was one and probably the nicest thing ever said about him.
Runour has it he is scouring the EVE Universe & Marketplace for a Real Woman Locator Agent or T3 Module.
It is allegedly categorically not true that his inventory is packed full of exotic dancers, alcohol and banned substances.
Amongst his most infamous early outbursts were squealing like a girl when he was ganked in low-sec by bad guys having the sheer audacity to pod him! I mean, really?! He then whined incessently about this injustice to Neville Smit, who reportedly put a kill order out on Ghost just to get him to STFU.
The next few weeks weren't much better. Ghost was becoming proficient in losing ships ineptly, and was being suggested as an ideal candidate to write a new EVE Uni Course, The Dummies Guide to PvP. (editors note : in his defence, Ghost didn't technically "lose" hs ships, as he knew which part of the galaxy all 37 billion pieces of atomised metal that used to resemble a ship were located).
Still traumatised by the profile pictures and comical killed board, Ghost resorted to spending much of his early Uni career lurking in asteroid belts watching girls go by, trying to spot any real women, and with no luck he decided to start hunting Whores whilst on Uni offensive roams around the galaxy. (there's a theme there!) This unfortunately upset his fleetmates as Ghost was meant to be concentrating on War Targets at the time.
In sheer desperation, and need of a hug and cookie from Laura Karpinski which actually ended up in a court case for improper and inappropriate behaviour and no cookies for ever, he was press ganged into Service in the PO Department and his Undock Button was withdrawn.
This turned into Ghost's proudest moment so far in EVE to date, when he and some PO colleagues were awarded the E-Uni Service Medal of Excellence for being part of an elite E-Uni PO Dept Special Ops Stealth Ninja Hit Squad that decimated "The Queue" from 3 weeks to 24 hrs in less that 12 days. He then consequently whined like a grl that there was little work to do afterwards. Just can't please some people eh?
Now desperate to stop the constant whining, PO Management decided to increase his workload and promote Ghost to a Senior Personnel Officer role, hoping this would have the desired effect. It didn't.
One night when scrounging for crumbs left over from everyone else's cookies, Ghost found the key to the drawer containng the staff Undock Buttons. He cackled with glee as he took the key and launched out the airlock, and was frustrated at his inability to target lock and kill people until he realised his pod was unarmed.
After realising that it helps to be in a combat ship, he started to learn some PvP tips from exasperated colleagues and was often used as target practice.
Amazingly enough, after weeks of training, he has since given the impression that he is actually an accomplished EWAR/ECM pilot that likes nothing more than jamming the cr*p out of his targets whilst his fleetmates blow them to hell and back. That's the theory anyway. (Just don't mention the gate camp bust that was an epic fail!) Irrsepectively, he will whine and moan if he is not added to any kill mail that he was in the vicinity of 300M AU of.
This phenomena was backed by a strange and unheard of occurrance, the award of a The Uni Silver Cross combat medal. (Rumours that he won it off an exotic dancer are grossly unfair and exaggerated).
IRL Ghost is ex-UK military and has seen combat ops in too many places. Consequently he has developed a phobia of beach holidays due to many tours in sandy locations around the globe in recent times.
An unfortunate side effect of this is that the PO Dept uses the phrase "incoming" to announce new Unistas, which often sees Ghost diving under a table screaming for air support.
History
- Was born as a proud new Gallente (2013.05.15)
- Joined EVE University (2013.05.25).
- Qualified as [Personnel Officer] (2013.08.04).
- Promoted to [Senior Personnel Officer] (2013.09.08).
Decorations
Ghost has been awarded the following Medals during his time with E-Uni :
Ribbons
- Star of Outstanding Service
- Silver cross
- Expert EWAR Operator
- Scourge of Hi-Sec
- Sophomore
- Basic Training
